Sometimes.............

.............I would like to be the one who is taken care of.

Sometimes I get sick of being the one who everyone comes to, but yet when I want to go to them, it's like "Oh, she couldn't possibly be needing help or need my shoulder to cry on".

Sometimes it just sucks.

Sometimes I want to be the "helpless one" who needs that helping hand.

Sometimes I wish I hadn't grown up being the "responsible one".

Somtimes I don't want to be the "strong one".

Sometimes..........

This weekend was just a sucky one for me, it seems in terms of emotions. You think I was PMSing or something. It seemed that things just ticked me off. Geez, why do I have to be the one who handles everything? Why do I "have" to know where everything is? Why is it my fault when something isn't where THEY put it? Why do I get to clean up the mess when I want to go out shopping by myself for a couple of hours?

I know why, because I brought this on myself. Because I grew up this way. It's just who I am.

And I love being able to know where things are, to help someone when they are having problems. I love taking charge and getting things under control. I love the fact that if someone needs someone to talk to or help dealing with something in their life, that they know they can come to me.

I want to be able to be the "rock" for them. But I also need a rock of my own sometimes.............